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Did bog all on Friday - which I was gutted with coz I knew I wouldn't see much of Yorkie over the weekend.

Saturday morning: Shopping HELL! Dropped Yorkie off at work and came back to Lancaster to do some shopping for this hen-night. Spent hours trapcing round, and found NOTHING! Actually, that's not trye, I bought two tops which were on sale, but neither were suitable for the night out - too hippy / gothy. I like them....

I was all for wearing my black strappy pants (bits hanging off ALL OVER) and my red/black/white Sud Ex top, which gives me Lara Croft tits, and I got a call off Sarah. Telling me she's bought a blue strapless dress with chocolate dots on, and that Fran was wearing jeans - but Designer £80.00 jeans! And a floaty girly glam top. Looked down at my out fit. Pouted!

So for the next two hours I'm pouring over my old clothes - bagged up and ready to be shipped off to various charity shops or to get flogged on eBay - until I find the one girly glam top I have ever owned. It's red, thin strapped, floaty and has little diamond-like things on it. HAD IF FOREVER! Worn it once. Also dug out evil high sandles of death (equally red and glam). So now I look all sexy and glam - until I try to WALK! Looking in the mirror is a shock - I actually look like a GIRL *pah*

Turned up at Frans to many squeals and simperings over sexy girly outfits - Fran's face fell when I told her I'd had this top and shoes for about 5 years (godda love RETRO), and deep concerns about the deformed shortbread willies that Sarah and insinerated in a mad attempt at baking.

Had to laugh at poor Michelle though - Frans mate - We've met before (fran tried to set her up with our mate Mark, but he was already well smittem with Gemma,and she's an old mate for Yorkie's etc). She was introduced to the people from Fran's work who she's not met before, then sat down oposite me, and lokked at me all quizicle.

"So, who are you then??" She asks me.

I loved that. She's the first person to not recognise me after I lost weight. She almost choaked when I told her and she remembered. Well, I have lost three stone!

OK, the 8 girls: Fran, Sarah (Maid of honour & Ray's gf), Michelle (Frans other best mate), Alice (Frans sister), Anne (Mad friend who - last time I met her - fell off Frans kitchen side and smashed the skirting board with her shoes), Lisa & (erm... DAMN I knew the name two seconds ago - I'll call her Brenda until I remember and edit, coz she reminded me of my aunt Brends), oh, and me!

Limo turned up at 8 and took off to Revolution for MUCH vodka cocktails and shots. We stayed for about an hour, then back in the Limo and off to Bolton, drinking champers and singing to Bon Jovi and Robbie Williams (Jacs would have LOVED it!)

On the way - a plot of formed that we should all "pull a minger". This is not hard task for most of the people I know as we seem to attract the strangest of people whether I want to or not!

The night club - of - no - name (too drunk to care by this stage) was HUGE! And full of very scarry Townie types,all dressed in tight fitting white clothes which showed off all the horrible lumpie bits they really should be trying to hide! GIrl nuber nine - whoes name I never knew - also turned up, I assume she lived near by some where and that's why we met her there.

I was third to be "pulled".... some odd looking bloke tried to chat me up (ahhh) and was gentally re-buffed. My SECONDED minger wouldn't keep his hands off me! I was only dancing and I got maulled from behind by a faceless octopus! RUN AWAY! Minger 3 wasn't actually a minger at all, he was very sweet and sang to me and kissed my hand - sweet! Had I been single, I'd have been OFF, but he's not a patch on my feller, so sorry love! Had to say good bye before he got attached, lol.

At the end of the night, like I said I came third out of now 9 girls in the minger race, but came joint first in getting 3! Very shallow!!!!!

Limo came for us a little after we left and got food (which couldn't go in the limo with us - had to leave half my kebeb! Boo!) and took us back. "Brenda" was dropped off, then Sarah, then the rest ebeded up back at Frans for Michelles sweetie of a bf to come and drive us all home.

Simon was already home from his Stag night, and comatos on the bed - we left him alone.

I sadly had to go to bed all on my tod, as even though the stag was home and in bed, the stag party was carrying on without him! Naturally Yorkie was on it.

When my feller STILL had not come home at 4 the next evening, I desided to go looking for him, and found him at Mark and Gemmas house - barely concious! A chinese was prompty ordered, and VERY dodgy Russian stag night porn was watched (includig a guy with implants in his cock for that added stilmualtion for the ladies. GUYS! DO NOT GET THIS DONE! IT LOOKS LIKE GENIATAL WARTS! YOU WILL NOT PULL WITH A NOB LIKE THAT! Unless you just pull it alone) before we trudged home and passed out in a heap.

I felt like DEATH this morning, and was not going to go to work. I dropped Yorkie and Gemma off and came back home, planning on going to bed fo the reast of the year. As soon as I walk in the door, I hear the phone ring. I assume it's Glenn wanting to know why I'm not in and answer - but no, it's Yorkie and Gemma! The computers have gone mental AGAIN! So I HAVE to got to work, poorly, sick and dying to fix the bastrd things - again!

Feel ok now - had food and coffee and have woken up. Still full of sniffles, and my gut still hurts (it's been like that for WEEKS now - gonna HAVE to see the doc), but appart from that..... It's been a good weekend!


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