Tuesday, November 08, 2005
This rant might upset you
.... But I am SICK of hearing about this on the TV and I want to state my view on it.
Abortions on teenagers, approved by doctors, without the partents consent or knowlege. Good or Bad? This is not about whether abortions are right or wrong, it's about the right to confientiality!
This woman who has been on the news lately ranting about how it is terrible that she wasn't told by the family doctor about her daughters abortion is driving me MAD! The truth is, this girl considered herself mature enough to have sex. Phsically she is! And she chose how to deal with the consequences.
She made the choice to have sex. She got pregnant. She didn't tell her mother, she went to her doctor and had an abortion. Now, regardless of your oppinion on abortions, this was her choice, and she made it. In the circumstances I feel that she made a logical, mature choice. A very sad one admitedly ans one which she will cry about for years, but the logical one. How is anyone of that age supposed to be able to care for a child they way it NEEDS to be cared for? In this day and age we smoother our children, and dont allow them to grow up mentally at the same rate as they grow up physically. This means that although we are physically capable of being mothers in our teens, we are emotionally too stunted to cope and provide the right love and care. (generally speaking)
If her realtionship with her mother is not a good enough one to share these problems and choices with, that's the mothers fault! BE A BETTER MOTHER! Think about what you have done that means your child doesn't want to confide in you!! In that situation, can you imagin what would be the result of telling said parent? Being forced to have a child you don't want and don't love is damaging to the child - life long damage!!! I have known children who were not wanted by their mothers, and it fucks them up for life! Getting in a public strop and going on a controle-freak-overdrive wont make your child confide ANYTHING in you EVER AGAIN!
What if the girls parents are violent? Abusive? In extream cases of child abouse, what if the child which is to be aborted is the PRODUCT of this abouse????? Would you tell that parents then?????? NO! But how do you make that call? How can you justify telling one set of parents, but not another? And what happens if you do tell all parents? Will the pregnent daughter of an abusive family situation go to the doctor at all? Or would it be a wire coat hanger in a scalding bath job, like that which was so common in years past, often resulting in the DEATH of the girl involved?!
I'm getting away from the point though.
One arguement this mother came up with was: If a nurse gives my child paracetamol in school, I am notified, if a yough centre worker needs to put a plaster on my child, I am notified, if my child has an abortion, my doctor does not notify me.
Paracetamol at school - Your child might be alergic, they have to make sure. They do not have your childs medical records!
Plaster from Youth Centre - Teachers etc are not allowed to touch a bleeding pupil unless they have rubber gloves on because of the risk of HIV and other such blood transmitted illnesses. They have to say. And again.... THEY DO NOT HAVE YOUR CHILDS MEDICAL RECORDS!
ANYTHING AT THE DOCTORS - Patient-doctor confidentiality! That's all that should matter. They are medically trained and have only the physical welfair of the patients in mind. They will not do something to damage you! They know what's best, they will treat a person thus, and so what if the patient doesn't want to tell their parents, it's their choice! Doctors will recommend telling your mother etc, but they will not force you, and they will also offer councilling!
You have to remember that having an abortion at any age is a traumatic experience. There is guilt, hormonal imbalances, and grieveing to deal with. It is not the kind of thing any normal woman (of any age) would do just for the fun of it. It is often a last resort, or an only option. We would all like to think that we, or our children, would be able to reach out to family members for support in a time like this, but not every one can. And if a girl wants to keep this information away from their parents, that should be their choice. Chances are that one day, when they have dealt with it their own way, they will tell their mums. Sure, mum will be very upset that their daughter chose to keep it from them, but maybe then will consider where they have been lacking as parents.
In my oppinion this woman needs to stop ranting on TV about taking away our lawful right to privacy, stop being a complete controle freak where her children are concerned, and worry more about the fact that she didn't know her children were having illegal under aged sex! She needs to get on with being a MOTHER!
OK, rant over. If you want to make a comment you can. I don't expect you to agree with me on this one, and that's fine. This is my view on the matter, and I am entitled to it, as all of you are to yours.