Thursday, December 15, 2005

Up and Down

it's been one of those days. I'm not sure if I'm happy, or if I'm sad today. I'm not feeling very social I know that, at least, not social enough to climb out of the secure bubble that is my house and see people.

I went to MM day. Saw the boss man - shock horror - for all of 30 seconds before he barked orders at S and shot off again. Had a bit of a laugh with D, particularly when the computer that used to be "mine" when I was a full time emplyee of MM packed in and died. Not really sure what's wrong with it, but I suspect is has a serious case of viruses! As the anti-virus expired months ago and boss man has done nothing about it! Lucky for him I have the web site back up, other wise we'd loose the lot on a clean start on that pc. Not that any of that will have occured to him. D says he might be able to get it fixed on Monday. But so long as I get my cash on Thu I don't really care. I can prove I've done the work, wether I'm at MM or here at home. And if I don't get paid, he can kiss his web site, and me, good bye!

Got a call from Jacs today. She'll be in tomorrow so I'll be able to call in her and the girls once I've been to see Nan. That'll be a nice day out! It's ages since I've seen either Nan or Jacs, and I should see them both more often. I have a car, there's no real excuse not to get of my fat ass and drive over there to see them all.

I do mange to keep in touch with some of my friends though, me and Andrea have arranged to have a girly day on Tuesday. We're going for a sauna - which will be great, I haven't had one for so long - and then we're off for lunch. It sounds like she needs to get out and have a natter as badly as I do! She can't make it for my sing star night on Sat though. She's at her Hubby's staff do. But I will get her on sing star one day! Oh yes I will!

Yorkie's going to have to do a bit of Christmas shopping before we set off out for the day though. Tomorrow is his last day off until he breaks up for Christmas and he's not even half way done yet! He even admitted he didn'thave my gift yet!!! I wrapped his today and put it under our tree! Maybe he's feeling guilted by that, lol.

Lelly and Coops sent me a text earlier asking if we wanted to come over and see them tonight. I didn't think Yorkie would be up to it with him working till 8 tonight, but as he has no work tomorrow, and Lelly and Coops are both off tomorrow he desided that it would be a good idea after all. That sounded great, and I was all up for going. But then my nasty depressed brain started working over time and I desided that I didn't want to go as Mark and Gemma were going to be there and I can't be arsed with any more smart assed comments about our marriage. So rather than let my paranoia spoil the evening I told Yorkie I had work to do (which I did, I've just finished it now, half an hour after he's gone) and said I wanted to stay in. After all, I do have a lot of driving to do tomorrow and I don't want to be tired on the road.

To be honest, as much as I love him, I am just in the mood to be on my own tonight. I fancy a nice quiet night in. Maybe sim for a bit, and then take myself off to bed and watch a movie until I fall asleep. I have all kinds of random thoughts running through my head and I would rather pour them out on here than bore the poor bloke to death going over old ground again. He knows how I feel, and we both know there's nothing we can do about it, just ride it out. No point bring him down too, not when he's been so good at keeping me happy.

And I have been productive with my time. I've wrapped a load of presents tonight. Our tree is looking very happy with an assortment of coloured boxes under it. Shame most of them will vanish tomorrow, but they have been bought and wrapped for other people! I've even burned a nice cheerful Christmas CD for us to listen to in the car - much to Yorkie's dispare, having listened to XMas music all night at work! And I have worked, I have dealt with two suppliers and made a stack of new Christmas listings. Hopefully people will buy the stuff over the next few days so I can actually PAY for it! And then I'll be happy happy joy joy again. For a while anyway!
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