It's only a few days away. It also feels like a million years. I was talking to Mark last night and asked him what he thought: Was Wednesday really exciting and therefore an eternity away, or absolutely terrifying and therefore here before we know it? He wasn't sure. And neither am I!
I can't wait to meet this baby, to be able to use the name we have chosen instead of "It" all the time (in my head, of course, I have been for weeks but Mark still doesn't know if we have a Rosie or a Tom), to cuddle and snuggle and feed them, bring them home and start this next new phase of our family life.
On the other hand... it is a wee bit scary. Just because I've already had a baby doesn't mean that giving birth again isn't a worry (although one I'm not stressing about too much, it's inevitable and drugs will help with the pain). And just because we already have one child it doesn't mean that things aren't going to change because they are. Poor Jack is going to have to learn to share not just his toys but his parents too. And that's going to be hard for him. I think he will have the hardest period of adjustment. I'm much more confident this time because I do at least know which end of a baby is up now, but it's still all going to be new because this is a NEW small person, and not another Jack.
I'm trying to fill my days between now and then. Yesterday I did some housework - sorted out the nursery so Jack can sleep in there for a couple of nights while mum has his room (for when I'm in the hospital) and put the car seat and moses basket back together. Today I took Jack in to town to visit the library (and pick up some more meds for me, the e-coli's come back although I have no symptoms). Tomorrow is Dads Club so I can get some more housework and stuff done (I love my quiet Saturday mornings!). Sunday Jacquie's talking about coming over. SO I need to fill Monday & Tuesday to stop myself from going mad! I hoping this lovely weather holds out so I can take Jack to the park on at least one of those days. I never was any good at waiting for stuff like Christmas and Birthdays.... and this is just so much more!
My bags are already packed and ready to go including bags of extra clothes for baby if for any reason we have to stay in the hospital after the birth and the bag with the bits in for coming home. Neither of which I'll be taking with me on Wed but which can be brought when/if they are needed. We don't need to buy anything else (which is good because we have no money), and we are sorted for car seat, crib, basket, clothes and nappies. I'll be breastfeeding so food is covered too. I'm sure once Wednesday is here I'll wonder where the time has gone and panic that I haven't done everything, even though I will have done. But from this end it seems such a staggering distance away.... And right round the corner all at the same time!