Errrrrgh! Hospital this afternoon....
And the midwife too actually. Mum's coming over (and bringing the double buggy with her) to look after Jack while Mark and I go off to see the middy at 2.15, and the hospital at 3pm. I'm a bit torn between looking forward to it and dreading it. Midwife's will be fine - I'm going to ask if she can get the Doppler on my belly because Mark has never heard Squiggle's heart beat. I just hope she's not behind because we'll end up being late for the hossy then.
It's the hospital apt that I'm wary of. I'm having a cervical examination. The long and short of it is they want to have a feel of what state my cervix is in, and if my body is any where near ready to have this baby. And I know it's going to be uncomfortable. If not out and out painful (more so because I'm nervous of it.... must calm down!)
Bare in mind that on this day in my preg with Jack (38 weeks 4 days) I had woken up with back ache and a bloody show and was, basically, in labour. Jack being born in the early hours of the following morning. But so far... nothing! I thought I may have been slowly loosing my plug over the last few days, but that seems to have stopped now (and may just be a UTI or normal 3rd tri CM). I've had the odd twinge here and there, but nothing regular or even all that often. Like, once or twice a day but nothing else. I'm doing what I can to get ready. But I feel like it's not doing much.
Baby is moving well. Turning round and round I think as sometimes I can feel feet and hands, sometimes back and bottom. I am so very sleepy too. All I want to do is sleep. I feel rotten disappearing off up to bed or conking out on the sofa and leaving Mark to look after Jack, so I'm trying not to do it much. But I do need to build up a reserve of energy for the birth (when ever it happens) and lets face it, for at least the next 6 months I'll be the one on night-feed duty as I'll be breastfeeding, so it will balance out in the long run. I still feel mean though. Mark assures me it's fine, but I can see that it's grinding him down and he's tired too. Jack wants me to play with him and I'm finding it so hard. I can't get on the floor with him, he can't sit on my knee, picking him up and chucking him about leaves me unable to breath... Once baby is here I am looking forward to being able to move again so I can play with Jack too before he decides that mummy is dull or doesn't want to know.
Gah.... I am just procrastinating now. I should be getting stuff ready in case the hospital decides to take some action. I should be giving the kitchen a once over coz my mum will be here in an hour or 2 and it would be nice not to have a scruffy kitchen. Marks just come down from his shower, I've just put some words and numbers on Jack's blackboard her him to learn (including Baby and Nana). I really should get myself away from this computer and into the housework. Really I should.
Back later to say how it went!