Skip to main content

Secret Diary Post - Anxiety for no apparent reason


Yesterday I thought I was starting with a panic attack. I used to get them years ago when I first suffered from SAD and again when a long term relationship ended traumatically, but it's not something I've had for a very long time. Like more than 12 years.

I started with the trembling, the aching tingle in my bones, esp my forearms and hands, my breathing went shallow, I could hear the blood rushing through my ears, I wanted to run and hide. But from what? I was just sat in the livingroom on my own. Hubby at work, Jack & Tom in school & nursery, and George having his nap in his room. I was totally freaked out for nothing!

It passed. I mentioned it to Hubby who is worried about me and Bean now, but I figured it was a one off and tried to forget about it.

This afternoon it happened again. Same sort of time of day. This time, being a weekend, I have all the kids with me. Georgie was napping again and the other two were playing nicely and quietly in the same room as me (a rare thing, it happens some times, but it's not enough to through me into a panic).

I'm not aware of being worried about anything. The kids are fine. Me and Hubby are fine. So is work. Even the car insurance is little more than an irritation and certainly not a stress. I have no reason to think there is anything wrong with Bean, I'm assuming everything is fine.

I have my scan on Monday so maybe I am subconsciously worried about that, but I really do feel fine about it. I'm looking forward to it! Can't wait to see my little bean for the first time! I'm certainly nothing like as worried as I was with my others because I'm fairly sure how this pregnancy will go (another 9lb+ boy, another consultant lead GD suspected pregnancy, with another induction booked for a few days before my due date) and if anything I am more confident than I have ever been before. 

Everything is "FINE"! So why the anxiety!? 

*slap self round face*

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Pretty Princess 💗 No.4 son #boyswhoaregirls #girlswhoareboys

via Instagram http://bit.ly/2G4fgYQ
1 comment
Read more

Wedding List.... (OMG)

A new kitchen.... Really! We need one! So I've been saying to people that we'll want either B&Q or Ikea vouchers... Only I can't say which yet because I haven't choosen which one I like best: B&Q Oak Shaker style: ( on froogle ) ( on their site ) Ikea: Tildaholm BECAUSE... our kitchen is REALLY badly laid out, the storage is dropping to bits, the seal round the sink is black and festering, the oven hasn't worked for YEARS (the hob and grill are ok though), the seal on one of thef ridge doors has gone too, and the floor... half tiled, half bare concret! But now I have to choose which one I like best, and get the measurements sorted out, and then get the prices for what I can have in the space we've got... PHEW!
Post a Comment
Read more

Recipe Review: Hairy Bikers liver & bacon with onions & gravy

I need a bit of comfort food at this time of year. I really love this recipe from The Hairy Bikers:  Liver and bacon with onions and gravy  and freely admit that I have whipped this from the BBC Food website. I follow the recipe (but sometimes chuck some mushrooms in too) and split it four ways at 11 pro points per serving. It's a classic, and even my 6 year old likes liver cooked like this - the 4 & 2 year olds need a little extra ketchup to convince them. The Hairy Bikers’ traditional liver and bacon makes a simple supper packed full of flavour and bursting with vitamins and minerals Ingredients 450g/1lb lambs’  liver , sliced and fully thawed if frozen 25g/1oz  butter 2 tbsp  sunflower oil 4 tbsp  plain flour 1  onion , halved lengthways and sliced 125g/4½oz rindless streaky  bacon  rashers, each cut into 4–5 pieces 1  beef stock  cube 500ml/18fl oz  jus t-boiled water 1–2 tsp tomato  ketchup salt and freshly ground  black pepper Preparation method Rinse the liver in a cola
Post a Comment
Read more